jumbled update
1:57 a.m. - 05.26.03
it's been so long since my last update - and so much has happened.
most of it has had to do with my new arts promotion business, and being named feature poet.
i could go on and on about our last MOVE event (the name of our 'group') -- on how our first 'big' art show attrected more than 400 ticket paying visitors ($10 each). we got on the arts radio show that is really popular here in our city -- that was great.
plus, i was on another radio station for my feature poet award -- that was way cool too. danielle was there to see me, so was my partner ken and his son and his super-cool roomate tim. it humbled me to have that awesome support from my friends. i saw my old boyfirend there, too. not chris, the rapist, but dave, the one cinematographer guy who i fell for years ago and almost got back together last year -- after 2 months of emails to him explaining the last 3 years and my bi-polar. he was the one who said he accepted me no matter what, then left a few weeks later, well,, he was there, but i didn't feel like talking to him. i had my future in front of me - kris and vince and root beer floats (kris and vince are just cool friends), danielle and ken and my poetry. i didn't need to placate to dave because i saw him at the festival walking around, trying to find me, by himself. he emailed me the next day and told me he tried to find the stage i was on, but he did hear me on the radio, and read the quote from thomas mulready, who said that i was
"a young voice imbued with experience, her words defy her years."
yes, i did not need to go into my past, i only have to look at the future.
uggh, this entry is so disorganized, and i'm sure hard to read, i'm still leading up to the point of ray.
yes, i said ray -- not dan.
dan is a good friend. he's going through a very hard time now. but, i have concluded, especially since i work 'with' him, so to speak (he's one of the artists we represent), that i only want to be just friends with him. i understand where he is rigt now. i've been there myself. i really wasn't mad whaen he called a few hours before my performance, said he's be there, then he didn't show. he's done that about 4 times, if you remember. yes, he can only be a friend. i can't set myself up for that.
Ray is just so different. so much to say about ray.
but, in short,
Ray is a MAN. thank God ....
(he told me he thanked God for me coming back into his life -- wow)
jumbled update - 05.26.03
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