hugged
3:49 p.m. - 05.02.03
i have the art show tonight - so i can't really get into the truly haunting, magical spiritual moment i believe i may have had last night. i will get too emotional and freak out.
when i was talking with God last night, i even told Him that i was feeling so wierd bearing my soul to Him and thanking Him for my Life; that please don't let anything happen to me that night to freak me out.
but i don't think He listened.
because - then i finally started talking to my Dad. and i actually told him that i really do forgive him. and i miss him. and i have always loved him. i told him that i know he has always loved me. i started to cry a little. and told him that i wish i could give him a hug.
at 10:30 i turned off the PC and went upstairs to watch some tv with grandma. she was watching 'replacing dad' on the hallmark channel. a dad had to leave a family with a little girl and a boy because he was unfaithful. he came back into the picture by calling his ex. he had a gun in a motel and he was going to kill himself. she went to the hotel with cops. she went in and talked to him, gun in hand and hunched and defeated on the bed.
he looked up at her with all of his sincerity and tears,
" it's just too hard."
by then the children were in the doorway.
"and i just love my son."
and then the little girl risked his gun and ran up, said 'daddy,' and saved his life. she embraced him. his arms were frozen and outstretched. the mother took the gun easily. and, the father slowly, tightly and long, held her. and the brother came up and the father huged him. and then all of the family hugged, and walked out together.
is it too wierd to think that God can talk to you through tv? is it too wierd to think that God and Dad gave me that hug?
i don't know, but i'm keeping that thought.
hugged - 05.02.03
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