chuck part 2
3:30 a.m. - 08.16.02
chuck and i started to hang out after that, not on a regular basis, the friendship grew slowly, as we both had trust issues.
by summertime, he and i were good friends. he lived 4 streets away from me and hung out all the time. in the afternoons, we'd hang at his house by the pool, or race around in his car blasting our favorite group, 'the jesus and mary chain. by the time his parents were home from work, chuck was at my house until the early morning. we took walks almost every summer evening, catching lightning bugs as we walked to the 7/11. at the store, we'd load up on chips, soda and giant Kit Kat bars, then we'd go to the vacant lot nextdoor. they were starting to clear the land to build more low-income housing. i loved how he'd help me climb on top of the huge tractors and machines. we'd site there for hours, listening to the traffic as if they were ocean waves, and sharing the giant Kit Kat.
around 11 p.m. we'd get into chuck's car and pick up my younger brother from work. he worked at at ice cream stand, and he always made sure to make some 'mistake' orders throughout the night so we'd have icecream when we got home to watch movies until mom came home from her night shift. my favorite film we'd watch over and over that summer were 'The Outsiders," "The River's Edge,(one of Keanu's first films)" and, especially "Dangerously Close." it is probably my favorite film of my 80's adolecense agnst, and the soundtrack introduced me to The Smithereens. the film has been out of print for years now, but, thankfully now for the internet, i was able to get my own copy from half.com. mom would get home anywhere between 3-5 a.m. and that's when the party really started. mom usually found the three of us in the kitchen making pasta or frozen pizza, and we'd all sit down and have dinner at 4 am like a real family. those days. mom and my brother and i still savor those memories.
one time chuck didn't come over until after mom got home. mom's boyfriend was working nights that night as well, so we were all up watching a movie and having pizza when chuck finally came to the door. we told him to come in and he said 'no.' i went to the door and dragged him in. he was crying and his hands were both bloody, as well as a cut on his face. he and his dad got into another fight. mom and i took him to the hospital and ivited him to stay with us for a few days until we could all figure out 'what to do.' we called the army to find out what was the youngest age possible for him to sign up. we called foster programs, etc. i honestly can't remember what we found out.
i do remember the last time i saw him. we were sitting on my front steps finishing off popcicles. he asked if he could kiss me. i let him, but a second after i felt his lips on mine i backed off. there was a part of me that wanted to kiss him badly, but the frightened girl in me overtook the situation. Let down, sad, and embarrased, chuck walked away.
in 1989 i came home for christmas break from my first year at college. we were decorating the tree and waiting for the pizza delivery. when i heard the knock i had the strangest feeling that i knew it was chuck. it was. we were all so happy to see him, me most of all. he helped us finish the tree and then chuck took me for a drive with 'the jesus and mary chain' playing in the cassete deck. during our drive he said he was living in another town working as a busboy, and is girlfriend was a waitress and 8 years older than him. he dropped me off and i asked him if i could give him a hug. we sat in the car and held eachother for what seemed like most of the night, however it was probably only a few minutes. he said that one day he'd probably surprise me and stop back again.
even 13 years later, i still hope it's him when ever i hear a knock at the front door. i always wonder if he is doing ok.
chuck part 2 - 08.16.02
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