second entry
6:32 p.m. - 2002-03-01
second entry - i don't think i'm as manic today - but for me the day is just beginning. i woke up 3 hrs ago at 3. i can't stand still but i can't go anyplace, either.
i'm afraid my meds aren't working - i'm afraid that i may be to blame. i stopped taking them for my summer vacation in october and then started them back.
now, my meds are screwed up again. i might have a margarita, maybe some more words will come out.
next week i wasnt to start over again - clean slate - new doctor's appointment. i have to remember that i can't take on the world in one day. but i also have to remember that making your bed and going grocery shopping doesn't necessarily require all day to do it. but today that's all i could do.
right now i wish i was high. the margarita isn't bad, but weed does it better for me. after i take the first few puffs i feel lifted and clear. all my thoughts seem to make sense. i do not question everything that flys into my head. and i love to write and listen to music.
i have so many things in my head i want to write down - i's so fragmanted i don't know wether to write it in my paper journal, on here, or on my bipolar site. decisions like this can take all my energy out of me. this decision could take all night.
second entry - 2002-03-01
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